Today’s Podcast
Today’s Bible reading plan:
Read it in a year – Job 3-4
see the whole year’s plan [here](http://www.bible-reading.com/bible-plan.pdf)
Today’s Devotional
Matthew 5:31-32
Jesus: And here is something else: you have read in Deuteronomy that anyone who divorces his wife must do so fairly—he must give her the requisite certificate of divorce and send her on her way, free and unfettered. But I tell you this: unless your wife cheats on you, you must not divorce her, period. Nor are you to marry someone who has been married and divorces, for a divorced person who remarries commits adultery.
What do Jesus’ words mean for us today?
These are tough words for our society where the divorce rate soars around 50 percent. In fact, last year the divorce rate in our churches exceeded that of the unchurched. Partly because the unchurch decide not to marry and just live together, but what an indictment against the church. How do we let that happen in light of Jesus’ words? Did we forget what He said?
We have made divorce so easy and told ourselves that divorce is okay so we just throw relationships out the window when we get tired of them. God never intended them to be that way. He let us know that when He was here with us.
You might say, “We have progressed beyond those archaic rules. No one should have to stay in a relationship in which you are not happy.” I would tell you that God is a lot smarter than we are. Jesus said those words to a crowd in which marriages were arranged. Your parents told you who you would marry and you didn’t have much choice in the matter. Still the Lord of life says, don’t divorce.
The reason is relationships take work and are built by unselfishly giving to your spouse. Marriage isn’t about compromise. Spouses that go into a marriage with a 50/50 attitude never make it. Marriage is about being all in. It starts with an oath before God that you will love, honor, cherish, support, protect, do all those things …and most of the vows include that little phrase until death do us part.
So how does divorce get into the picture? Someone does something you don’t like and we jump out? Someone hurts our feelings so we quit? Someone doesn’t give us the sprinkles on our ice cream so we pout and cry and decide we’re done? It all goes back to one or both partners wanting more for themselves than for the other partner instead of giving themselves to the relationship.
Jesus saw through divorce for what it was. Selfishness in the relationship that God can fix and only He can fix. You think it will get better in another relationship? Not until you fix the selfishness you took with you into the first one. Why do you think 75 percent of second marriages end in divorce? Why do 90 percent of third marriages end in divorce? The reason is usually staring at you in the mirror. The reason is the self-centeredness that plagues the relationship on one or both parts.
Am I condoning staying in an abusive relationship? Absolutely not! But here’s the problem. A person that chooses an abusive spouse the first time very often chooses an abusive partner the second or third or fourth time. Stay in the relationship? No. Free yourself from the abuse and get help. But stay single. Don’t look for more trouble. Let God be your partner and don’t put yourself back into those abusive situations. You’ve already shown yourself you don’t choose well. Don’t exacerbate the problem.
Does that advice make me a terrible person? I don’t think so. It makes me a practical person having watched so many children suffer pain and agony of broken homes, abusive second and third step-parents. Children especially get lost in the relationships and the parents’ selfish desires to just be with anyone. Don’t do it. At least get the kids grown and out of the house before you think about finding that next mate. You’ll thank me for the advice some day.
But let’s go back to Jesus’ words. If you’re divorced, God forgives. He doesn’t like it. He wants relationships to thrive, but He forgives the past. If you’re married, work as hard as you can to keep your relationship growing. It takes both of you, but it’s worth the work. If you’re in a relationship, dating, thinking about marriage, pray hard. Make the right choice. Remember God expects you to marry for life, not for convenience.
These might be words we want to skip over and pretend Jesus didn’t say them, but He did. We have to contend with them even in our society in which divorce is rampant. Marriage is only a convenience for many. Vows mean little or nothing for too many that stand before an altar. Remember marriage was an institution created by God and He set the rules. When we abide by them, marriage works well. When we don’t, expect to suffer the consequences that come with it.
The Voice Bible Copyright © 2012 Thomas Nelson, Inc. The Voice™ translation © 2012 Ecclesia Bible Society All rights reserved. In accordance with the requirements for FTC full disclosure, I may have affiliate relationships with some or all of the producers of the items mentioned in this post who may provide a small commission to me when purchased through this site.